Mel: Oi, I’m sick of people thinking this show is just two obnoxious women being like “OOOOO REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE SLUTS, MEN ARE TRASH.”

Lia: Anything but… (That’s what I say to my boyfriend, zing)

Mel:  Yeah, I always think about when our dear friend Aleea said to us, after the first season in 2016, “What would this show be like if it wasn’t two hot women?” or something along those lines.

Lia: Then Matt, our producer, said “Oi, what if all the f**kbois got together and wrote a play about you?”

Mel: Yeah, well, my ego would f**king love it.

Lia: And I would welcome ANYONE talking about real feelings on stage, that shit is juicy!

Mel: I think that’s where the power of this works sits. In the honesty and vulnerability of what we are saying.

Lia: I had a lot of qualms about being this honest on stage. Will people think we are interesting?

Mel: It’s also super challenging when the people you have written about may show up.

Lia: Which they have done, but we just keep on keeping on.

Mel: Anyway, I digress, what’s with boys following me on instagram the morning after? Like literally, just after they’ve left my house.

Lia: What is that?! Boys do this thing, where they follow me on social media when we haven’t even matched on tinder, and I find that really creepy. Invasion of privacy, not taking a “no, we haven’t matched for a reason” as an actual “no, i don’t want to talk to you.” I hate it. Makes me mad.

Mel: Oi, I read a really good bio on tinder he other day: “Class struggle in the streets, comrade snuggle in the sheets.” I messaged him “omfg too good” and he never replied.

Lia: To digress yet again, I am a big fan of a man who is openly into cuddling. Could fang a cuddle ASAP.

Mel: I’m really into ‘the modern new age man’, offering to brush the sex knots outta my hair, it feels very intimate to me. But also I’m like “no, you don’t know how to do it”.

Lia: I will never know this pleasure, because even BEFORE the sex, I have the tousled hair of lion. Which is funny, because I also think men don’t know how to grab my hair, the fro, like “Is it a loofah? How do I hold it?” It presents a funny conundrum in the boudoir.

Mel: I think there’s a lot of things that men don’t know how to do.

Lia: And if we’re on this train, there’s a lot I don’t know how to do!

Mel: Sometimes, I think people assume we think we are experts on sex and intimacy and all things love, because we wrote this show. But ya couldn’t be more wrong. I guess this show is our way of trying to understand and process this stuff.

Lia: I’m just trying to live my life and be an ethical slut.

Mel: I think I’m past my slut days, my misspent youth.

Lia: Not what you said last night!

Mel: Don’t you dare write that!

Lia: I think the dumbest thing I’ve ever done, was break up with someone three days before my birthday.

Mel: I cry every birthday. I think there’s a lot of pressure on days when you’re meant to have fun.

Lia: Can confirm. It was probably the loneliest birthday ever.

Mel: I’ve never celebrated Valentine’s with someone before.

Lia: But again, I feel like that’s the power of the show. I feel like every performance we come together as a group and feel connected, I feel the comradery with a group of strangers. It always just feels like I’m gasbagging with some friends over a vino, or seven.

Mel: I feel like we could have used this time to go deep on theory and talk about #metoo movement and the culture in Australia in the wake of Eurydice Dixon, but sometimes, you don’t need theory, you just need some girlfriends to have a debrief with, and I guess, that’s a mood this show tries to cultivate.

Not with Love,

Wightman and Stark

August 2018